I’ve read the cards for over 30 years and use them to focus and believe.  Not because they have any power, but because I believe in the combined wisdom and history they represent.

I used the Grimaud version of the Tarot of Marseilles. A modern issue of the deck that evolved in the south of France in the 18th Century. The oldest deck is from Italy and dates back to 1450, drawn from a number of fragmented decks and commissioned by the powerful Visconti-Sforza family of Milan. I’m very excited to be visiting Milan soon, and hope also to visit the Accademia Carrara in Bergamo to see the oldest deck on display.

My reading this morning though was done with the simple blue yellow and red deck of the Marseilles variant. I like their simplicity. I think it makes it easier to focus on the associated and traditional meanings rather than battling some obscure symbology stuck on by a well-meaning occultist who had a penchant for wolves, blood, Indian headpieces or fairy wings.

The Tarot of Marseilles requires an unguarded approach. I started the reading with the Emperor and finished with the Empress. No prizes there for the question I asked was related to the work I need to be doing in the world.  The Empress is my card of choice, the self-sufficient artist at home creating from the earth what she needs. Gaia, Mother, delighting in her own creations – giving birth to her future.

The next card, the 4 of Pentacles was matched on the other side of the reading by the Moon. On the conscious side, if you like, are my preoccupations with security and stability. A sense of place in the world. Finding my place. Owning my place. On the unconscious side is the dreamer, the psychic, the madness of loss and grief, the lonely path ahead, but also the creation at night from the deep well-spring. Of course I want to feel safe, but I also want the psychic freedom to create my own way forward.  In fact I dreamt last weekend of a new job (but that’s a topic for another blog).

Then I laid out my favourite Queen. She of the Cups. The manifester, the lover of the unseen magic and other realms. I think she’s  a mini-version of the Empress, though she has more of the moon-mood-altering madness than her older sister. She’s the reason I get depressed, but she’s also my muse.  She sees things as she wants them to be and intuits the next step. It seems magical from outside but its because  in sync with her own process. Matching her in the reading is the adventurous energy of the Knight of Wands.

You’ve got to love this guy. He’s the journey expert. Off on another trip, this time to Greece, Italy and Croatia. This is the optimist, the expansive energy of hope and self-belief. This energy of adventure will play a part in the quest for my work. I will journey to the work. I’m on a journey for the work. I work right now and that work is my journey.  This card always comes up when a journey is imminent. So no surprises there.

My final card – the answer card – was the last one I pulled out this morning. It was the Hermit. The hermit - me now in the middle of my life. The hermit needing to focus on what has meaning and what matters to me. The hermit, alone, and forced back on my own resources, free of demands, save those I set for myself.

The Hermit and the Moon are friends. It used to be my late husband, Bloke’s card.  He pulled both several months before he died. It is also the card my twin sister invariably pulls out of the deck when I read for her. Father of prayer, meditation, deep solitude and reflection.  The Hermit, representing a new way to think. Uncluttered, crystalised this sort of thinking will light the way I need to go.

Normally I’d lay out another card over the top of this one to find out more. But I think I’ll just sit with it and meditate on it. I won’t rush in to fill it up with the wrong, empty, clanging thoughts that sound like; Move now, Leave the job now they don’t deserve you, choose another job out of the paper, Seek is a website not a way of life,  that one will do – it’s close enough.

Instead, I’ll sit with it. Being still, being alone, being focused, getting clear about my way of working in the world. It will be partly magical, partly dreamy, part adventurous, part secure, part creative and part controlled. With perfect stillness and peace of mind.

Doesn’t sound half bad.

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